The Unofficial Igor Ulanov Fan Club

Pain doesn't hurt.

2008-03-20T00:00:00.000-07:00

How does one obtain a studly mug such as the one seen above? There's an easy answer. Thanks to Scarlett for pointing this out (scroll down to the bottom of the post). Follow the link on her site to get the whole story.

"...Joni is as delicate as a 19th century lady." Priceless.

Russian Super League Hockey > Essay Assignment on Orange Revolution

2008-03-19T11:53:00.001-07:00

While my fantasy hockey teams' stats are all over the playoff map, I'd like to mention that the Lokomotiv's playoff dance is going just fine. I believe they're set to head into round three of the playoffs against the Metallurg Mg after having defeated the CSKA in four games (which is not a sweep in the RSL).

Fine job, boys!

The Relief Sets In

2008-03-14T12:19:00.001-07:00

'Tis a fine time to be an Igor Ulanov Fan Club! Though Ulanov has presumably known all along of his whereabouts, his devoted (one post per month - shame!) fan club has recently come across some new news. Thanks to trusty Yaroslavl correspondent Simone for alerting us to the fact that he had been playing on Loko's farm team after the mysterious events. They lost in the second round of the playoffs. Rumour has it that he may even return to the team next season under different coaches. We're still not clear on what led to his disappearance in the first place, but we're hoping that he hasn't been charged with an attitude problem.

Yaroslavl is currently battling CSKA Moscow in the Super League playoffs. The series is tied 1-1, with the next game happening on the 16th. Good Luck!

A Touch of Nostalgia:You-LAN-ov versus Peca

2008-02-14T23:07:00.000-08:00

Igor Ulanov has left the building

2008-02-01T14:58:00.000-08:00

The robustness of the charming young Ulanov is missing from the dressing room in Yaroslavl. Word on the street is that his performance (though not necessarily PIM) is lacking. Tired of warming the bench? Maybe. But he has left the dressing room, never to be heard from again. The team says he has retired. We're suspicious.

Disappointing performance? Sign on with this year's squad of ~~Timbits~~ Oilers!

(seriously, though. Come back)

I'll be your net.

2007-12-09T15:10:00.000-08:00

The current Oilers are in somewhat of a scoring slump, but their former teammate certainly doesn't appear to be. The studly Mr Ulanov scored one for the Lokomotiv in their 4-3 victory over Lada on 1 December.

On 5 December, Lokomotiv lost to Traktor by a score of 6-3, but they won against Metallurg of Magnitogorsk on 7 December. Their next game is against Vityaz on 19 December. Lokomotiv is currently #5 in the standings, according to The Russian Hockey Digest.

This is the kind of picture that wins you a hot off!

2007-11-19T21:52:00.000-08:00

Unfortunately, this is not the picture that was used. Yes, thanks to all the bellyaching that Ulanov isn't even an Oiler anymore (blah, blah, technicalities, technicalities) and that shouldn't even be in the Hot Off, Ulanov lost his round to that shifty-eyed caterpillar face.

I wasn't as bitter last year when Ulanov lost in the first round to Moreau, because Moreau ended up beating everyone else. This year, Ulanov lost to a less worthy opponent.

Rory Fitz-who?

2007-11-06T17:45:00.000-08:00

Vote Ulanov

Raffi Torres doesn't respect classy facial hair.

Man on Fire!

2007-11-03T13:00:00.000-07:00

Ulanov has 5 points in fifteen games this season. All are in the form of assists, but I'm still dreaming of a hat trick. It has come to my attention (via text message by a good friend), that radio station Team 1260's morning show is advocating the return of the spring chicken. Did you see what happened to Mathieu "Stitchface" Roy last night?

Lokomotiv is on a three-game winning streak, and they take on Nizhniy Novgorod Torpedo on 14 November.

And that's fire, not a multi-coloured swarm of arena insects.

Happy birthday, Mr. President Ulanov!

2007-10-01T21:15:00.000-07:00

Ulanov is 38 today. October is clearly the sexiest month for birthdays.

And he's back! In the last game before Ulanov's return, Yaroslavl lost to the Khimik 6-3. On 27 September, Ulanov made his return (to the loudest cheers ever heard in an arena anywhere, no doubt), and the Lokomotiv lost to the Moscow CSKA 5-2. But Ulanov posted a point in the form of an assist! We didn't have to wait long this season! He also got some kind of penalty that Babblefish wouldn't translate. On 30 September, the Lokomotiv beat Kazaan AK Bars 5-2, and Ulanov got another assist. Hot!

Get well soon!

2007-09-23T17:22:00.000-07:00

I've been trying to post the picture for a week. Stupid Blogger.

What kind of hijinks has Ulanov's team been up to in his absence? The Lokomotiv was on the road for two games, losing 4-1 the Magnitogorsk Metallurg on the 15th. They then lost on the 17th 3-1 to the Chelyabinsk Traktor. The week of the 18th saw Yaroslavl back at home for two games. On the 20th, they shitkicked Ufa Salavat Yulaev 7-1. They lost on the 22nd to Togliatti Lada 5-4. Their next game will be played at Mytischi (Khimik) on the 25th. Best of luck!

Fun word of the day: Duodenum

Adam Huxley, you'd best be on your merry way.

2007-09-17T20:43:00.000-07:00

Only one man is allowed to wear number 55 in this town.

No train wrecks here...

2007-09-14T16:10:00.000-07:00

The Lokomotiv played two games at home this week. On 10 September, they defeated the Khabarovsk Amur 4-0, and two days later they took out the Chekhov Vityaz 5-2. Well done, Yaroslavl.

In other news, it appears that Ulanov is injured, but he should be back playing in games later this month. I had just assumed that he had been given a one-way ticket to the press box. Ha! Silly me! Also, he's sporting a fashionable double five on his jersey this season (as opposed to the single 5 of last). All is right with the Superleague world.

The annual fan club frustration is upon us...

2007-09-07T14:10:00.000-07:00

The Lokomotiv started the season off with a bang! They defeated Novosibirsk 6-3 on 4 September while on the road, but two days later they succumbed to the power of Novokuznetsk(?) and lost 2-1. And where was Ulanov through all of this? Not on the ice, that's for damn sure!

And who is that fine-looking young man on the top right?

And they're off!

2007-09-06T17:58:00.000-07:00

The Russian Superleague season started September 4th. As soon as the website is updated, I'll let you know how the Lokomotiv's first game went. And they have Yashin on their team now (which apparently raised ticket prices).

I wrote this on somebody's car. In sharpie.

2007-08-06T01:05:00.001-07:00

With permission, of course. The car was entered into a demolition derby in New Brunswick. They came in...5th! That's a lucky digit. Err...where have we been for the last 3 months? I have no excuse, but here's a nice picture of the fan club executive sporting the trendiest in hang over fashion while lying on the kitchen floor. That t-shirt was lent to me by a Jets/Flames fan. No one can resist that Edmonton charm, despite its hockey team's atrocious play of the yester-season.

I've received an update from our Yaroslavl fan/correspondent, and she says that he has been signed for this season with Yaroslavl and is set to play in a pre-season tournament. Also, he is apparently a "very snappy dresser."

Spotlight on: Winnipeg

2007-05-10T16:50:00.000-07:00

First off, I'd like to apologize for my absence. I went on a road trip to San Jose for some playoff action, seeing as there wasn't anything going on here in Edmonton. Thanks to Don E. Coyote for stepping in and posting a video about horses. And I'd also like to apologize to him again for my being a sleeping turd. Anywho...

Today's city of interest is Winnipeg. Winnipeg is located in Manitoba oblast and was once home to the Winnipeg Jets, before the team moved to Phoenix, never to be heard from again. The first thing I think of when I think about Winnipeg is the Jets. The second is that Fountain Tire commercial that most TV-owning Canadians have been watching for the past two years (at least). You know the one I'm talking about. The Fountain Tire spokesman is excited about going to Hawaii, but then figures that somehow he boarded the wrong plane and is "gooooooiiiiinnnggg to Winnipeg." How he managed to board the wrong plane is beyond me. Isn't security fairly tight in airports these days?

Manitoba can be found in central Canada, nestled snuggly between Saskatchewan and Ontario. It is the Easternmost prairie province, and people driving across Canada from West to East are very thankful of that, I'm sure. Winnipeg is known as the Gateway to the West. According to Wikipedia, it is strong in the fields of agriculture, finance, education, transportation, and manufacturing. Winnipeg is the largest city in Manitoba, and it's home to Manitoba's second largest public university, the appropriately named University of Winnipeg. Winnipeg is also located near Lake Winnipeg, which is Canada's fifth largest lake and the world's eleventh. I think that's where they filmed the now-defunct Canadian teen drama, Falcon Beach. I once saw five minutes of it. It wasn't very good. Winnipeg hosted the Pan-Am Games twice, the only other city besides Mexico City to have received that honour. According to the 2006 census, Winnipeg's population is 633 451. I once worked with a guy who moved from Winnipeg to Edmonton after he had been stabbed three times. I cannot explain why he moved to Edmonton to avoid getting stabbed, but maybe that's a story for another day. On the front page of the Edmonton Journal.

Winnipeg has a rich history. It was established in 1738 as Fort Rouge, and later underwent a name change in 1822 as Fort Garry. It became Winnipeg in 1873. Winnipeg was the site of the Red River Rebellion, led by Riel, in 1869. The post World War 1 strike, The Winnipeg General Strike, occurred in 1919. 35 000 people walked off the job. The government responded with violence, and two people were killed and another thirty were injured. The strike made way for the creation of the social democratic party, the CCF.

Igor Ulanov was drafted 203rd overall by the Winnipeg Jets in the 1991 NHL entry draft. He went on to play in four NHL seasons with the Jets before being traded to the Washington Caps. Ulanov scored his first NHL goal while playing for Winnipeg on 17 February 1992 against the Islanders.

And last but not least, Saturday is a day that will belong to Russia and to Canada, IIHF semi-final style.

Spotlight on: Nothing to do with hockey....

2007-05-01T16:15:00.000-07:00

So, here's a funny story. I have absolutely nothing to write about, especially seeing as the lokomotiv season is over, and I'm not following any of the playoffs. So here's a completely unrelated post, but I think it is worth a look. And by worth a look, I mean I made the video, so Watch it! Love you all.

Spotlight on: Voskresensk (Воскресенск)

2007-04-21T12:20:00.000-07:00

I had a very difficult finding pictures of Voskresensk. During my search, I mainly found various photos and sites for the Voskresensk Khimik (which is why this city gets the spotlight in the first place), various websites suggesting that I marry women from Voskresensk, and pictures of trains, which are extremely boring (unless they come from Yaroslavl - ha, ha, ha). So it appears that Voskresensk is big on trains. Then I found a site that sells shark teeth. Shark teeth from Voskresensk. This tooth...ah, well I think they said it best:

A GEM, very rare Sphenodus tooth, from a very early shark. Absolutely great preservation - excellent condition with extra sharp cutting edges and a needle tip. Perfect tooth. These are Upper Jurassic age from Voskresensk, Russia. Top quality. A rare, killer tooth!

And for only $145, this killer tooth can be yours. Anyway, let's get back to Voskresensk. It's located in Moscow oblast, 80-ish km southeast of the city of Moscow. Its population appears to be in decline. According to Wikipedia's census numbers. In 2002, the population was 77 871. It was 79 900 and 81 400 in 2000 and 1991, respectively. Voskresensk was the original name of the nearby town of Istra until 1929. Voskresensk-Istra achieved town status in the eighteenth century, while the current home of the Khimik achieved this status in 1938. I couldn't find a weather report for Voskresensk, but in Istra it is currently 2 degrees, with a high for today of 8. And it's raining!

Ulanov played for the Voskresensk Khimik for about a season and a half between 1990 and 1992 before joining the Jets in '92. He had a total of nine points for Voskresensk.

On an unrelated note, our thoughts are with Laika's family even after all these years.

July: a season of hope

2007-04-19T18:35:00.000-07:00

Tomorrow (when I have a small break in exams, it being the weekend and all) I will get back to the posts that I've promised but not delivered. For now, let's take a look back in history. July 2006 was a month full of hope. In my mind, there was still the smallest of chances that Ulanov would be re-signed. Then there was this. Click on the link in the last paragraph. How little I knew then. July 2006 also saw the birth of Hot Oil.

Oh Tom Gilbert, you're the next best thing.

Spotlight on: Perm (not the hairstyle)

2007-04-11T11:54:00.000-07:00

Today's city is Perm. The Perm Central Square is pictured (Krasnov Travel Agency) above. It is apparently a popular site for wedding photos. Like Krasnokamsk, Perm is located in Perm oblast. It is the most Eastern city of Europe. Perm has a roaring population of 1.2 million people and is Russia's 6th largest city. It was, for a period, called Molotov after the USSR's Stalin-era foreign minister. Perm officially became a city in 1723, and 12 July still brings many celebrations. The region around Perm is rich in timber, minerals, and oil. It is also a main Russian transportation hub, with the Trans Siberian Railway passing through it.

During the Cold War, Perm was the a major military industry site was kept a secret from the outside world. It did not appear on many Soviet-made maps. Perm is one of the most multicultural cities in Russia. It is currently cloudy in Perm, with a high of two degrees Celsius and a low of -2.

Igor Ulanov played a total 74 regular season games over three seasons (1985-1988) with Perm Molot, then of the Rus-1 league and now of the Russian Superleague. Its logo appears to be some kind of bear.

The key word is "fine."

2007-04-10T11:36:00.000-07:00

So, Sunday (err...Tuesday) brings another edition of "In the Cards." Today's Igor Ulanov hockey card is pictured above with a "heart" around it (we all know how good I am at drawing those). It's a Topps card, #468.

"Ulanov is a fine all-around player who's more than willing to participate in the physical aspects of the game. Ulanov is a highly rated prospect who registered a respectable rookie season. Ulanov, a native Russian, registered 11 points in 27 games last season for the Jets. He's a quick defenseman with a fine shot from the point. He's noted as an offensive defenseman, but has improved defensively."

Fine!

Spotlight on: Krasnokamsk (Краснокамска)

2007-04-05T10:20:00.000-07:00

Every Wednesday the fan club will feature a different city that somehow pertains to Igor Ulanov. Yeah, I know today's Thursday, but I spent yesterday clutching a mug of Neocitran and cursing the USA men's national curling team.

Above, in a picture taken by Sergei Pakhomov, is the Second World War memorial in Krasnokamsk. Ulanov was born in Kransnokamsk on 1 October 1969.

Krasnokamsk is located in Perm oblast in western Russia. It is situated along the Kama river. Krasnokamsk was founded in 1929 as a pulp and paper mill settlement, and it became a town in 1938. An oil refinery opened there in 1943 and its main idustries are now oil refinery and metalworking. Krasnokamsk has a population of about 53 000 people. It is currently 8 degrees celsius there, with a high of nine degrees for today.

It's all in the cards.

2007-04-01T21:21:00.000-07:00

Welcome to Sunday evening. Tonight kicks off a weekly Sunday feature involving Igor Ulanov hockey cards. Pictured above is the fan club's collection of Ulanov stuff (minus the most prized possesion: the game-worn Paul Coffey Night jersey). Since there won't be much for news on the Ulanov front, Sundays will bring excerpts from the back of hockey cards.

First Up: card #416 from the Leaf Set, copyright 1994 by Donruss Inc. (top row, second from the right). The front shows Ulanov wearing the away (dark) Winnipeg Jets jersey while sporting a look of concentration. On the back it says, "While known more for his defensive play than his offensive abilities, Igor was just one assist shy from leading Jets' defensemen in that category last season." The back of the card also shows his stats from the 93-94 season. He played 74 games, had zero goals and seventeen assists. He sat at a -11 with 165 penalty minutes.

Now I'm off to E-bay to see if the ten cent Ulanov hockey card section has been replenished.

For the Love of Two Teams

2007-03-28T00:52:00.000-07:00

I realized something the other day. I am a fan of Yaroslavl Lokomotiv. Well that may not come as a surprise, just remember how this all started out. I started following Loko when Ulanov signed with them. I would look at his player page and nothing else. Somewhere along the way, though, I became a fan of the entire team. Due to the fact that I live right outside of Edmonton, news about the Oilers pretty much falls into my lap on a daily basis. I spend way more time on the Lokomotiv's site than I do on the Oilers one. I sit here at the computer madly trying to decipher what it says, while using shitty online translators because I have zero knowledge of the Russian language. My fandom will follow Ulanov to whatever team he plays for, but now I sort of have two teams and never the two shall meet. Perhaps one day I'll even see the second one in action.

I taped the Oilers game from last night where they played (and lost, but not badly for a change) in Nashville, and lo and behold, there was a fan there wearing a Lokomotiv jersey. I had to rewind and look about three times just to make sure. Also, Mini 'Nov (Tom Gilbert) got two assists and the second star of the game.