Thursday, July 13, 2006

Welcome to Fantasyland. You had better start calling him "captain."

After much thought and much ridicule, I have finally completed my fantasy hockey team. It is a rather large team, and I had to bring a few people out of retirement in order to create the sort of team that I dream about at night. I don't have a name for the team yet, but if you have any suggestions you can let me know. Here are captain Igor and his defensive partner, the lovely Mr. Kravchuk. When looking at the team, you can leave the cursor over the link and a box might pop up with my comments about the players. Also, my apologies to Ruslan Salei on being cut from the team, due to the fact that his defensive partner turned out to by a six-foot-five traitor. Those kinds of people are not welcome on my team. Before we begin, please click here for a humourous story about everyone's favourite Canadian, Boris Mironov.

Heather's Fantasy Team:

Grand Masters of Goaltending:
Bob Essensa #30 (picture)
Grant Fuhr #31 (picture)
Mike Morrison #1
Ryan Miller #3

Bosses of the Blueline:
Igor Double Trouble
Igor Ulanov 'C' #55 and Igor Kravchuk #21
Alphabet Neighbours
Janne Niinimaa #44 and Boris Mironov 'A' #2
The Pair with Almost Nothing in Common
Roman Hamrlik #4 and Scott Ferguson #23

Ferocious Forwards (I apparently felt the need to have seven lines):
First Line: Kariya gets the honour
Paul Kariya #9 - Wayne Gretzky 'A' #99 - Jari Kurri #17
Second Line: A Finn sandwich
Miroslav Satan #32 - Saku Koivu #87 - Martin Havlat #24
Third Line: Russian and/or Ugly
Maxim Afinogenov #61 - Mike Ricci #40 - Alexander Ovechkin #8
Fourth Line: The Eastern Birthplace Triangle
Alex Tanguay #18 - Mike York #16 - Dan Cleary #7
Fifth Line: My other assistant captain is on the fifth line
Jason Chimera #25 - Boyd Devereaux #15 - Fernando "Pants" Pisani 'A' #34
Sixth Line: For the love of God, this is taking forever
Jochen Hecht #59 - Mats Lindgren #14 - Anson Carter #77
Seventh Line: Gritty yet delicious
Brad Isbister #75 - Rem Murray #22 - Todd Harvey #13

Team Toilet Scrubbers:
They are required to scrub the toilets with toothbrushes, and they must hold them in their mouths.
Rod Brind'Amour
Chris Chelios
Sean Avery
Teemu Selanne


Blogger Scrubs & Shines said...

What about Roloson? Hey not nice about Rod Brind Amour... For years Ive had Ron on my wish list for Edmonton... I like Igor and wish him the best with or without being with the Oil. How about dream coaches ? Mac T would be my number one! Like your site!

9:22 PM, July 15, 2006  
Blogger the Prez said...

Thanks for stopping by. I didn't add Roloson because, although he was a very special man in the playoffs, I just didn't have room (says the woman with an obscene amount of forwards). I just don't envision Roli on my fantasy team. As far as coaches go, I wouldn't select MacTavish unless my team enjoyed getting too many men penalties. Do you remember how much talk there was regarding the future of MacT's job during the regular season?
But your opinions are valid, as the 05-06 Oilers did create something special.

Rod Brind'Amour makes small children cry, although I'll bet not to the extent that Messier did/does.

2:56 AM, July 16, 2006  

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